Dedication to the Journey

BALL!!!!

2009-03-27T13:39:00.002-06:00

Abram said his first real word today(except for dada, he has been doing that for awhile). He has been very fond of his blue ball that he got for his first birthday from Uncle Brian and Aunt Michelle. He has been able to go get the ball when asked for awhile. However, I was quite surprised when Abram walked up to me with a small ball and said "bawwlll". Since then we have been talking about the ball constantly. Right now he is saying "bawwll bawwll bawwll" because his is stuck under the table. Abram is finally learning English!! I was wondering if he ever would...

Grrrr

2009-02-17T14:39:00.002-06:00

I am sooooo mad right now! I don't often splurge on myself. However, I thought now that I am working full time again it was time to get a good haircut and start coloring (highlighting) it again. I spent an insane amount of time and a decent amount of money to get a really crappy cut and color. You can't tell the color is any different and the cut is NOT WHAT I ASKED FOR. I am not talking "wanted to look like the model in the picture via the haircut". I am talking...asked for her to cut my hair one way, came out with a different length and style than I asked for. I know she got what I was looking for because she asked questions that concurred with the style I desired. So, now I have a football helmet head with really expensive non-highlights. This just sealed my decision to return to the hairstylist that I had prior to getting married. It costs a bit more but at least I will be happy with the outcome.

I am off to wash this blob head and see if I can get some kind of shape other than football out of it.

Calling all blog addresses

2009-02-15T23:00:00.004-06:00

I somehow deleted all my blog followings. If you have a blog could you reply in a comment with your address so I can get those back up? I am in blog withdrawl!

Thank you!

Sometimes

2009-02-14T09:37:00.002-06:00

Sometimes people who you thought were good people make really horrible choices and change your view of them.

Sometimes waiters and waitresses can be too attentive.

Retreat

2009-02-05T13:37:00.002-06:00

I have had a stressful couple days. One of my clients "fired" me...she was unsatisfied with the way that I was working with her family and decided they would be better without my services. There is a lot of history to this person and everyone involved agrees it is not my fault. However, it still feels pretty bad. So, I am dealing with this and saying goodbye to the family. Yesterday, I went into Barnes and Noble to get some coffee and wallow a bit. As soon as I walked in the smell of new books and coffee hit me and I felt peace. I had forgotten what a retreat the bookstore is to me. Maybe its thousands of pieces of literature on such a variety of topics that it helps to put my problems and worries into perspective. Maybe it is the wealth of knowledge at my fingertips that provides a calm. All I know is right now as I sit in this bookstore I get a little retreat from my life and worries...and I get a nice cup of coffee.

Sad but Happy too

2009-01-28T12:35:00.003-06:00

Today when I brought Abram to daycare I was snuggling him before I turned him over. He started wriggling to get out of my arms and cried to get to Jodi. My heart broke as I watched my baby want to be with someone other than me (or Barry or my dad who are the only other people he will at times prefer over me). I got into my car called Barry and cried. I am really really really glad that he likes it there so much but it makes me hate working and having my baby with someone else during much of the day. I am feeling very sorry for myself today.

Hello Mini, Goodbye TV

2009-01-26T13:29:00.002-06:00

Last night I purchased a new mini laptop that I will be using for work. It is fantastic and so small and cute! It has a 10" screen and and almost full sized keyboard. It will allow me to take notes during an in-home session so I can be more organized and actually get paid for the paperwork portion of my job! And the best part is it can be a tax write off since it's going to work with me.

However, the budgeters that we are needed to offset the cost of the computer so...goodbye dish and DVR. Barry called to cancel today and it was shut off immediately. We are both in a little shock over this. I don't know what I will do next time I need to go to the bathroom during a show and can't pause it! Although since most of my shows are on while I am at work I will more than likely not have to worry about this scenario. I am excited about the extra time I will have but will miss the unwinding that TV provided.

So, Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill, and Secret Life of the American Teenager I bid you farewell!

How Abram met his new friend, Penguin

2009-01-18T22:20:00.002-06:00

On Saturday Abram turned one year old. He had a wonderful party with many friends and family helping him celebrate his first birthday. Unfortunately, his birthday took a turn for the worse and we ended up back where it all started one year ago that day, Methodist Hospital. On Friday we noticed that Abram was developing another cold, we were sad that he was going to be sick on his birthday but we didn't see anything unusual. Saturday he wasn't his usual self and after hearing two of our friends who are nurses express concern (along with my dad's urging) we called the nurseline to get an opinion on bringing him in to urgent care. He was wheezing and had labored breathing. We decided to take him into a pediatric clinic and he was seen by a doctor there. The doctor took a quick look at him hooked him up to a nebulizer and said that she needed to call an ambulance to transfer him to the emergency department to monitor his oxygen saturation. I immediately started crying while little Abram sat on my lab with Barry holding the neb mask up to his face. I have never been so scared in my life! But we knew he was safe now...I just kept thinking about what could have happened if we hadn't brought him in. So, the ambulance came, they strapped me to the gurney and I held Abram for the ride over. He had oxygen and his third neb. on the way over to Methodist hospital. In the emergency department they did a swab for influenza and RSV and they both were negative. Abram got his first xray that showed "cloudy" spots on his left lung. So, they started treating for pneumonia...or they tried to anyways. They needed to start an IV and draw some blood but they could not find a vein. 4 different teams tried to get it and no one could. It was horrible having to hold him down and listen to him scream as various people dug needles into his skin. The Dr. was pretty insistent that they get the IV in but after about 2 hours of trying we asked what else could be done. They gave an antibiotic shot and an oral steriod. As soon as that got in his system he was doing so much better. We were admitted to the peds floor and they tried one more time to get the IV in. At this point in was about 2am and we were exhausted. Abram cried but he barely had enough energy to fight. She couldn't get it and we were able to sleep after another nebulizer. Overnight his O2 stats were really good and when the doctor came by in the morning he checked him out and said that he was cleared to leave. We came home with our penguin friend who gives Abram his nebulizer every 4 hours and an antibiotic to clear any traces of pneumonia. We are off to see the doctor early Monday morning for a check up.

I do have to say through it all the doctor and nursing staff at Methodist were wonderful. They thought Abram was the cutest baby and made sure to feel extra sorry for him spending his first birthday in the hospital. My favorite person was the paramedic that rode over in the ambulance with us. She was fabulous and really helped me understand that babies can be looking normal one minute and be in high distress the next (and I shouldn't beat myself up about not knowing to bring him in sooner). Abram did so great, he was the first baby the xray technician worked with that didn't cry during the chest scan. He took his medicine well and only really was upset during the poking process and who would blame him for that!

Not many babies get an ambulance ride on their first birthday. I am sure it will be a story he will ask to hear over and over, "tell me about my first birthday when we rode in the ambulance mommy!"

Daycare

2009-01-07T13:23:00.002-06:00

"why did you do that to my hair?"

Abram started at his in-home daycare this week. We had gone a few times to visit and let Abram play with the other kids prior to Monday. Leaving him was really hard even though we had been using babysitters for the last month anyways. He looked at me with a look the said "where are you going without me!?!?!" and did the cry so hard no sound comes out cry. However, he had stopped crying by the time I was putting my shoes on (out of view). Today at drop of he gave a couple half hearted whines and turned to his friends and toys, done crying before I was even out of the room. Chalk this one up to one of those very sad and very happy moments. I am so glad he is liking it there and it feels comfortable for him. I am very sad he forgot about his mama so easily!!!

Poor Baby!

2008-12-11T14:12:00.004-06:00

Abram caught a little stomach bug and has been feeling under the weather. This is his first real illness (other than the million colds he has had). I feel so bad for him! I found out he wasn't feeling well on Tuesday when I went to get him from his nap and he had thrown up in his crib. I will tell you, I have never felt as much mom guilt as I did finding out that he had thrown up and I didn't know. He had crawled to the other side of the crib so he didn't have to lay by his throw up. After I got him cleaned up he threw up one more time and made little coughing and groaning noises. So sad! He is feeling better now but still isn't back to himself yet.

Excuses

2008-12-05T11:41:00.002-06:00

I like my new job a lot. One complication I have run into is late cancellations...meaning that I am calling from outside the house because no one is there. Or at times they do call me an hour or so before said appointment. Here are some highlights of the excuses I have heard:

-Our whole house has head lice (ok, that works for me)
-We all have the stomach flu and temps over 100 (you didn't know this a few hours ago??)
-I am in detention and have to stay after school
-People are coming over later (and...)
-I am too busy (really? when has that excuse ever worked...)

And my all time fav.
-We are moving...right now (As I show up at the door)

Baby Steps

2008-11-30T17:37:00.003-06:00

We spent Thanksgiving with Barry's family in Winona this year. Abram decided to show off and walk a few steps on Thanksgiving evening. He had been experimenting with one or two steps at a time over the last week. His first long trek was four steps towards me! The next evening he walked about 7 feet before toppling over. Since then he has been practicing a few steps at a time. It is so cute to watch...but also very sad to think that my little baby is growing up!

Over the last week Abram had his first Thanksgiving dinner (he could not get enough!), learned to climb stairs, and started turning up the stereo and bouncing to the music (except when he would turn it up too loud...then he would scoot away crying).

We hope everyone had as great of a Thanksgiving as we did!

First Words

2008-11-15T08:19:00.002-06:00

"Being Naughty"

Ah, the time of developing words is nearing soon. Abram makes lots of sounds and occasionally makes some words accidently. This morning Barry, Abram, and I were cuddling and Abram said, something that starts with a B and rhymes with witch! I asked him what he said and he repeated it, and again when Barry asked him but that time he added in an "r" sound. We were laughing so hard, until he said sh*t, then uncontrollable laughter ensued. Apparently the syllables Abram decides to string together will all be naughty words. Good thing he can't make the "ffff" sound!

Twins

2008-11-10T13:04:00.002-06:00

My neighbor has been having his house resided. Aside from the constant hammering and sawing on my deck (yes, they overflow all there material and workspace on our property), I looked out the widow this morning to what I thought was a mirror. "geez" I thought "the sun must be really bright to be reflecting our siding off the house next door". To my horror I discovered that the neighbors had chosen to reside in exactly our siding. So alike is this siding that I would bet money that it is the same brand and color number. If I see dark brown shutters go up I am gonna throw down.
I can see it now..."can't wait to see you! To get to my house drive here and here. I am the tan house with brown shutters...right next to the tan house with brown shutters..."

Test

2008-11-03T09:30:00.002-06:00

2008-10-30T08:54:00.000-06:00

I read this sign today and it made me laugh.

"I don't skinny dip, I chunky dunk"

Denied

2008-10-25T13:47:00.002-06:00

A few weeks ago I heard about a baby storytime at our local library that happens on Saturday mornings. Today was the first Saturday we had free to go. So Abram and I packed up in the stroller and walked over. When we get there we find out that the storytime is downstairs. We also find the elevator broken. So, I ask politely where I can leave the stroller so that we can take the stairs. I was told that I could not leave the stroller anywhere. I was so mad! Either fix the elevator or let me leave the stroller upstairs so that we can walk down. That has got to break some accessibility laws doesn't it!?! What if it was a person who was handicapped? Would they be turned away as well? I am considering boycotting the library. Although they probably wouldn't care anyways. Grrr.

9 Month Well Check

2008-10-22T10:12:00.003-06:00

Abram went to the doctor today for his 9 month well check. He is doing well. His weight came in at the 45% which is really good for him (he was at the 10th % when he was one month old). He must have just had a growth spurt because his height was all the way up to the 95%. Overall, he is doing well and is hitting his milestones on time.

Finally!

2008-10-20T16:43:00.002-06:00

Our fears that Abram somehow missed the development of teeth during the gestation process have been proven false. Gummy McGumster has cut his first tooth! We can feel the little spiky thing and see a bit of it. It took 9 long months but alas the time has come. I will miss that gummy grin...

Tagged

2008-10-16T21:27:00.002-06:00

Here are the rules:
1.Post the rules on your blog
2.Write 6 random things about yourself
3.Tag 6 people at the end of your post
4.If you are tagged, just do it, and pass the tag along!

1. I am so completely excited to participate in the hood ceremony at my commencement this weekend. I have dreamed about this for years and can't believe that I am finally here. When I picked up my cap and gown and they took the hood for the ceremony I choked up a bit.

2. Abram and I are currently trying to become multilingual. We spent last month learning French, which was easy for me since that was my language in highschool. We are on to Mandarin Chinese now. I am not catching on at all...but they have these catchy songs that I can remember the syllables to so I go around singing something and not really knowing what I am saying. It is all in hopes that early exposure will allow Abram to learn languages easier later in life.

3. If I could have any job in the world (and not have to worry about dying) I would be in the CIA. If I could have any artistic skill in the world it would be a toss up between cake decorating and photography.

4. I can not stand roof shingles that are old and curl up on the edges. If a whole roof is covered with them it actually makes me want to throw up. I feel like throwing up a little just thinking about it.

5. I know a secret that the rest of my family doesn't know yet.

6. When I was very young I wanted to be a boy. I actually thought I was a boy for a while because all the neighborhood kids were boys and that's who I played with all the time. I remember when I was about 4 asking my dad if I could play outside without my shirt on like everyone else.

I am tagging: Mom, Brandy, Bill, Jenny, Erin, and Rachel (although you have an excuse for not responding Rach :)

I'm coming to get 'cha!

2008-10-06T10:16:00.005-06:00

Favorites

2008-10-06T09:55:00.003-06:00

Abram is having a hard time with his teeth (acquiring them that is). Therefore, he is uber crabby baby and doesn't sleep well. During these times that he wears on my patience I think on my favorites about him:

1. Looking back at him in the car seat and seeing only the top of his head and the tips of his toes.

2. Watching him twist himself into a standing position in his crib while half asleep with his head nodding off to the side while his body stands him up.

3. Listening to him whisper babble to himself while he plays with his toys.

4. Laughing with him while he gets tickled and gives big belly laughs.

5. Seeing him look back at me to make sure I am still there and watching him explore.

6. Admiring his ability to get his sock off and in his mouth while in any position.

7. Gazing at him while he sleeps soundly in his crib...and sometimes with his little butt pushed up in the air.

8. Snuggling with him at night before he goes to sleep.

I really could go on forever so I will just stop there.

Children's songs

2008-09-19T19:41:00.003-06:00

Abram and I usually spend part of our day playing with toys in the living room and listening to children's songs while we play. My mom gave us a CD set with 150 children's songs on it. I have fun listening to songs from my childhood that I had forgotten. I also have heard some politically correct word changes (ring around the rosie is no more). I have also heard some songs that make me say..."What?!?" Like the one that merrily sings,

Don't throw your junk in my backyard, my backyard, my backyard. Don't throw your junk in my backyard, my backyard's full.

then in the same song sings

Fish and chips and vinegar, vinegar, vinegar. Fish and chips and vinegar, vinegar (something something).

Could they really not find anything else to sing about? But my all time favorite goes a little something like this (hear upbeat clap hand and stomp foot type of rhythm):

I know a wienie man, he owns a wienie stand. He sells everything from hotdogs on down. One day I'll change his life, I'll be his wienie wife. Hotdog, I love that wienie ma-an.

I asked Barry tonight how someone could have possibly come up with those songs. He replied with one word, "drugs".

Stuck!

2008-09-15T22:23:00.002-06:00

For the past few weeks Abram has been perfecting his skills at sitting up and standing up. This usually works out pretty well for him as he likes to control his environment. However, it does not work so well when he sits or stands in his crib...and...well...gets stuck. He cries until we come in and lay him back down again. Poor kid, doesn't know how to lay down.

And I am done

2008-08-28T08:34:00.001-06:00

I just turned in my last requirements for graduation. I am off to take a nap while Abram is sleeping. I am so excited. And so tired.

Donna Martin Graduates!

2008-08-27T21:09:00.002-06:00

For some reason I have this chant in my head as I finish my portfolio. Maybe it's because all I can think about is graduation. Maybe it's because some form of 90210 is coming back on this fall. In any case...
Donna Martin Graduates! Donna Martin Graduates! Donna Martin Graduates!...

He Stands

2008-08-26T19:39:00.002-06:00

Abram pulled himself up to standing in his crib today! It was so funny to watch him. He struggled with it at first and was so proud of himself when he reached standing. Guess it's time to lower the crib mattress. I have been delaying that since when I put him to bed I lean in close to him and "shhhh" him for awhile. Now I won't be able to do that. Sniff Sniff. However, he has become a good cuddler when he is tired so I can replace my close time there. I will post a pic of him standing but in the spirit of getting my portfolio done...I'm out.

Somatoform Disorder

2008-08-24T19:51:00.003-06:00

Yes, I am back to diagnosing myself. However, I did not use my DSM for this one so bare with me. For the past couple days I have been really dizzy. I explained it to my dad and he described it as Vertigo. But really, I have nothing wrong with me. I have analyzed if I have glaucoma, a migraine, a blood clot, high blood pressure, diabetes, and a hernia (why not). I realized I have none of these things. I have stress that I am not acknowledging from finishing my degree. I have been pretending like it isn't stressing me out so my body decided to show me that it really is. I realized this after Barry was asking me questions about my project and with each question I felt like throwing up a little more each time. So, here is to acknowledging my stress, getting rid of Vertigo, and finishing my portfolio (insert urge to puke here). Ugh, I guess if I wind up in the hospital I was wrong with my diagnosis.

Almost...

2008-08-23T16:53:00.002-06:00

My portfolio is coming along really well! I hope to turn it in on Monday. Trying to stay focused is hard though. My mom and husband are a tremendous help!

A Whole New World

2008-08-19T06:10:00.002-06:00

I recently joined facebook and have found that it is a whole new world that I wasn't previously aware of. I am amazed by how many people I know who have facebook accounts. People from college, people from church, and people from my internship. Crazy fun.

Abram is lunging at the keyboard like it's an oasis in the desert. Here is what he writes:

opop;uuttf5555555555555555555f wddswq

Abram and I are off to Rochester to visit Vicki and the boys, then Bill and Rachel and hopefully the girls, then to Albert Lea for a few days. My goal is to get my papers done with the extra time I will have when grandpa and grandma enjoy spending time with their second youngest grandchild. Wish me success!

The Love of Sleep

2008-08-17T13:53:00.008-06:00

What Abram looks like when we put him to sleep

What Abram looks like when we check on him

Abram has joined his parents in a love of sleep. He went down for his nap about two hours ago and is still snoozing away. Last night he slept for 8 hours straight. This is not a new occurrence so I am marking it up as officially, regularly "sleeping through the night". Yeah for sleep!

Making baby food

2008-08-14T14:52:00.002-06:00

Today was not my first attempt at making Abram's food but it was my most extensive attempt. We rarely buy store packaged baby food and tend to go day by day with what we make for Bram. Today I thought I would get a bunch stored up in the freezer.

On the menu:
Acorn Squash
Butternut Squash
Sweet Potatoes
Peas
Carrots

I started with boiling the water to steam the peas and carrots. No problems there. While they were steaming I halved the squash and scooped out the seeds. Down the disposal and I was off to peel the...oh wait...the disposal seems to be jammed up a little. Let me use an oh so safe technique and put my hand down there (after it was off of course) to see what is stuck. Hmmm, lots of seeds. I will pick some out. Run water, try again. This time water is not draining and disposal is making a funny noise. Erg.

Leave it and on to blending up the peas and carrots. No problem...good old blender we got at our wedding works great...only 3 years old been used a handful of times because to be honest, I don't make very much stuff in the kitchen.

Sweet potatoes are peeled and put in boiling water. Squash is in the oven!

Abram wakes up from his nap, gets fresh peas and carrots!

Start blending sweet potatoes...going well...needs more water....needs lots more water...blender seems to be mad at me...finishes blending potatoes.

Abram very crabby needs lot of attention. Break from cooking to attend to him.

Abram back to his nap. Squash scooped out and put in the blender. Almost done all I have to do is blen...wait, maybe it's not plugged in...nope. I bet I need to press that reset button like I do sometimes when I am blowdrying my hair...nope. Button push, button push, nothing. Blender seems to be making funny humming noise. Blender does nothing but mock me with it's container full of my baby's squash. R.I.P. wedding gift blender that has been used a handful of times.

I think the cost of a new blender and garbage disposal is going to seriously offset my savings from homemade baby food!

Hey Angie...

2008-08-10T22:12:00.003-06:00

- So when is the next time you have to go to class?

- Umm, I think that would be never.

That's right folks, I finished my last class this weekend! I have sugar plums of PhD's dancing in my head but they can just keep dancing for the the next 10 years.

I will let you know when I get my projects turned in and have my official graduation date!!

Moving On Up

2008-08-07T16:34:00.006-06:00

Abram is getting so big! He amazes us every day with his new abilities. Just thought I would post some updated pictures for your viewing pleasure.

Disappointed

2008-07-24T12:17:00.002-06:00

I found out today that while I was not asked to stay on at my internship site the other intern was. This news has left me feeling extremely incompetent and very unsure of myself in my chosen career. I have not received any feedback as to why I was not chosen to stay on. I want to ask but yet don't. It feels very vulnerable to know that you were not the selected person and there were probably discussions about why to or not to hire someone. It feels very vulnerable to write this and share with the world (ok the dozen or so people who read this) that I wasn't good enough. There have been many tears of hurt and confusion shed today. Please be praying with me for peace and job opportunities.

6 Months Old

2008-07-22T14:21:00.002-06:00

Abram had his 6th month appointment today. It went well but we did start him on an antibiotic because of his persistent cold, possible pink eye, and the presence of another ear infection. But this should take care of it all, hopefully! He is a growing boy and weighed in at 16lb 13oz which is in the 40% (good job Abram!!) and he is 27 inches long staying in the 75% for height.

Abram now is sitting like a champ and has even been practicing standing at the coffee table! He is a connoisseur of many foods with avocado and sweet potatoes being a staple. Most foods have been mashed but he has tried very small chunks of banana. He basically eats everything we try, even when he makes funny faces and we assume he doesn't like the taste. We are very grateful for that since he has been trying to work his way up the weight chart.

Abram recently has added the syllables "dadadada" into his babbling. I guess that's ok since he has been saying "angie" for awhile.

We have roll over workshops because he is still trying to master the skill of rolling. I think as soon as he learns that he can use the technique to get places he will be more motivated. For now he just cries until we move him.

And He Sleeps

2008-07-15T07:38:00.003-06:00

I awoke on Sunday morning to the sounds of a little hungry boy. He was ravenously hungry because the last time he ate was 8 hours before!!! Yeah for Abram on his first sleep through the night. Boy were we ready for this milestone! He was waking up every three hours on Sunday night but last night had a six hour stretch. I think we are through the worst. I see many sleep filled nights in our future. Abram is also working on putting himself to sleep. Some nights he wants us right there with him until he is dreamland, other nights it seems like he wants us out of there in order to go to sleep.

And...I can't believe I didn't post about this sooner but...Abram also is sitting up on his own for short periods of time. He was "propping up" (thanks to Scott and Gia-hue for this funny term) but is now able to correct himself when he starts to lean to the sides. He still has some ways to go before I plop him down on the carpet alone but we are getting there. It seemed like one day he couldn't sit by himself and then all the sudden he was sitting. Time is going by so fast...

And it starts again

2008-07-05T12:44:00.002-06:00

The date was July 5th 2008, the time: 11:14 a.m. CST, the declaration: We will run! Barry, Vicki, Dave, and I are committing ourselves to another race. This time, we will all run, we say! The last attempt at this was over a year ago and it was unsuccessful. But today we are hopeful that team "Are We There Yet?" makes it over the finish line of the Medtronic TC 10 Mile. Wish us luck or if you are up for it join the team! We register for the lottery July 7th, we are registering as a team so we will all be in or all out.

Please Stop By

2008-06-29T19:22:00.004-06:00

In the last few months I have been feeling kind of restless in our house. While it was the perfect size for Barry and I when we were first married we are outgrowing it quickly with the addition of Abram. There seems to never be enough space: to store things, for Abram's toys, to walk... However, while thinking of all the things I could do with another 1000 or so sq feet I was convicted by the thought that we don't keep our small house picked up, how would we do it with a big house?!?

That's when I found www.flylady.net It is a fabulous website that helps Barry and I set up a routine to keep our surroundings company ready. (the thing that brought me to the site was the term CHAOS or Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome). It starts slow and goes from there. The last week on the "plan" has been fun and overwhelming. It's amazing how much mess can be made by two adults and a 5 month old. But we take it day by day. I have flynet to encourage me when I am feeling like I do the same things constantly throughout the day!

So, if you are in the neighborhood, please stop by. We will be ready for you!

The Pacifier Please

2008-06-27T11:46:00.003-06:00

Barry and I do a lot of sleepy parenting in the middle of the night. One of Barry's main tasks is to put Abram back to bed with his pacifier after he is done eating. This is what led to our current scenario:

In the middle of the night I woke up to my husband gently patting my face. When I inquired as to what, exactly, he was doing he mumbled, "oh, I thought you were baby". We both returned to sleep and forgot about it. During one of my cotherapy sessions today I suddenly remembered the event and tried very hard not to smile during the session. Turns out Barry was attempting to find my mouth (hence the patting) and insert the pacifier assumingly so I would sleep. I can't imagine what I would have done if he was successful and I woke up with a pacifier in my mouth!

He's on a roll

2008-06-12T09:04:00.003-06:00

Then...

Now...

That's right Abram has perfected the roll over from tummy to back. He and Barry were playing on the floor yesterday when Abram demonstrated his new ability. Ever since then we can't keep the kid on his belly. He just flips right over...I guess I expected this since he hates tummy time so much! I was at class when Abram decided to show Barry his skills so I missed it but got to watch this morning. I feel like we are on the verge of all kinds of exciting new skills for Abram. I am also feeling a little nostalgic for the little tiny baby he was, just looking up at us with his "cabbage patch doll" impressions!

On the school front, I just finished a huge project and presented it to my class yesterday. It feels so great to be done with it. Now I just have to take Research and Assessment and complete a portfolio with samples of the work I have done over the two years along with summaries of how I have progressed with each section. Look for an invite to a graduation fiesta in Aug/Sept!!

One Positive About a Baby Who Doesn't Sleep

2008-06-04T22:28:00.002-06:00

It definitely helps to be able to survive on little sleep when papers are due! I would scold myself on procrastinating but really, I tried hard to get bits of the paper done along the way. It's just hard and unpredictable with a baby.

A therapy tidbit for you: there is a theory that procrastination is a way to avoid relationships. Hmmm, I think the only relationship I am avoiding is with my pillow.

Back to work!

Almost Finished

2008-06-04T14:03:00.003-06:00

I am working on my Clinical Competency Evaluation right now while my wonderful mother is here watching Abram. I have a draft that needs to be sent out tonight and I present the paper along with video of a therapy session next Wednesday. Did you know that APA style writing allows only one space between sentences. Every paper I have ever written I have double spaced between sentences. So, I am spending much of my writing time backspacing to delete the double space.

I can't believe that I am nearing the end of my master's program. I have class this weekend then only one course and preparing my portfolio left. It's exciting and scary to be this close to finished. I now feel a lot of responsibility towards getting a good paying job to repay my husbands hard work over the last two years!

Ok, I better get back to work and utilize this time while I have a babysitter.

Group Projects

2008-05-29T07:49:00.003-06:00

I would like to mention that I really dislike group projects. I tend to partner up with people who "are so excited and want to finish the project sooner rather than later!!". Can you guess what happens over the course of the project being due?

Luckily I have only had two group projects in the last few courses.

A Spoon and a Cup

2008-05-27T14:38:00.002-06:00

These are two new things that were introduced into Bram's world this weekend. Bram got his first few sips of water from a sippy cup on Saturday. He wasn't quite sure what to do with the cup but has the hang of it today! He even grabs the handles to control the cup himself. Our hope is that by 6 months he will be able to drink his milk through the cup rather than have bottles (with assistance of course).

In a moment of desparation and sleep deprevation we decided to try feeding Bram some rice cereal. I was happy that we found a 100% organic whole grain variety and we gave it a try. It was a really fun and funny experience. Abram did not sleep any better with the 1/2 tablespoon of cereal he digested but we found out he really loves eating.

It is amazing at how fast time goes by. Right now Bram is sitting in a johnny jump up bouncing away holding his little stuffed frog (pictured in the last post). He is a funny guy!

Sweet Dreams

2008-05-20T18:44:00.006-06:00

Bram loves to stand and try to move on his own (he is no where near this but he thinks he is!)

Bram trying to show me he is a big boy now and can sleep in his room alone!

Abram just went to sleep in his very own room. This is his first adventure sleeping overnight in his room. He has taken a few naps in there to get used to the environment. He really does like his room so I don't think he minds being in there...I am another story however. I was trying to wait until he slept longer stretches before we moved him over but I don't think that is ever going to happen and he is growing out of his bassinet. So, every couple hours I will be making the trek across the hallway to feed him. I am sure he will end up in his bassinet later in the evening but at least it's a step!

Date Night!

2008-05-18T20:26:00.002-06:00

My mom is up visiting for a few days and wanted to watch Abram so Barry and I could have an evening out. It was our very first date night since he was born so we jumped at the opportunity! We tucked Bram into bed around 7:30 and left for sushi at Koyi in Minneapolis. Bram usually sleeps for about 3 to 4 hours on his first stretch so we were pretty sure we would be back before he even woke up. So, we ate some great sushi and then walked around downtown people watching for a while. We arrived back home around 10:30 thinking Abram would be starting to wake up for some milk. Turns out he just went to sleep about 20 minutes before...he woke up at 8:00 and stayed up the whole time we were gone! Apparently he knows it's party time when grandma's on duty!! But he was a good boy and he and grandma had fun playing. Barry and I also had a great night out. Although we did keep commenting on how it was strange to not have Abram with us.

Baby Well Check

2008-05-13T19:05:00.005-06:00

Hmmm...I wonder what I am supposed to do with this?

Eat it? ...nope.

Ah ha! Read it!

Abram had his 4 month well check today. He is doing well! He weighed in at 13lb 3oz which is about the 25% so he is still a little peanut but is healthy and happy. He is now 25.5 inches tall which is 75%.

When you bring your child in for the well baby check they have you fill out a form that says "tell me about your child" with a block of space for free writing. I excitedly filled in all of Abram's feats knowing that he would be the most brilliant of 4 month olds the doctor has seen. I then flipped the paper over to check off the milestones they have preprinted for the months. Yep, everything I had written on the front was covered in the three and four month milestones on the back. So, he is right on track and I am like every mom in the world who thinks no one could be as advanced as her child. To be fair he did have 2 of the 5 month milestones down as well.

I have decided that I really like our doctor. She is very supportive and gives us the information we need. She is on board with our delayed vaccination schedule and told me about how she also cloth diapered her children back in the 80's.

My First Mother's Day

2008-05-11T19:05:00.003-06:00

Today we celebrated my first Mother's Day. It was a good day even though I spent most of it in class. Barry and Abram started Mother's day yesterday evening since I had to be at class today. I came home to some pretty flowers and two homemade cards from the boys. I have had two wonderful dinners made for me and got to enjoy breakfast in bed before class today. Barry did a great job making me feel special!

Today is also the first Mother's day without my grandma. Periodically throughout the day I would think of memories of grandma. I know she would have loved Abram (especially because she loved Barry so much and Bram looks like a little Barry). I was also sad to think about my mom without a mother to celebrate with today.

To my mom, Thank you for being a wonderful mother and teaching me how to be a good mom to Abram!

The Baby

2008-05-02T15:30:00.005-06:00

You can't really see it in the picture but we spent about 15 minutes today blowing the "spit bubbles" pictured above.

Just sitting up playing with my toys like a big boy!

It has come to my attention that I call Abram "the baby" or "baby" quite a lot. That really doesn't seem fair to him because he definitely has his own personality and is not just a baby.

Here are some of the things I have learned about my son:

-He loves when people are silly and will laugh out loud to silliness

-He will "talk" to you, especially after daycare when he is on the changing table. He expects empathy and understanding during these talks.

-He is active and alert to new things

-He is not a cuddler. I realized this when he was sick over the last two weeks. At one point he laid his head on my shoulder while I was holding him. It was then that I realized that he hasn't really ever done that. I cherished those two minutes with his head on my shoulder.

-He is STUBBORN. I think Barry and I could both win awards with our stubbornness so I don't know why Abram being stubborn was a surprise to me!

Abram amazes me every day with the new things that he learns. I am going to try very hard to help him develop his identity and stop using the generic term "baby".

Happy May Day

2008-05-01T07:44:00.002-06:00

When I was little my mom and I would make May day baskets and fill them with candy to bring to our neighbors. May day baskets were given in secret so I would sneak up to the door, leave the basket on the doorstep, ring the bell, and run and hide so they wouldn't see me. I tend to forget about this memory until I realize that it is May day again and remember the tradition. I wonder if that is something I could start with my own children or if people would be too suspicious of a basket of candy anonymously left on their doorstep. I suppose it would depend on where I live...

It is also my nephew Caleb's birthday today! Happy 6th birthday Caleb!!!

At Play

2008-04-19T09:48:00.005-06:00

This is the Abram puppet show...he didn't move much but it was funny! The first of many piggyback rides!

He loves his caterpillar!

We have been able to enjoy more play time with Abram as he gets older. It's hard to believe he is 3 months old already! What a cutie!

Friends!

2008-04-13T16:57:00.003-06:00

Abram met some new friends and I was able to reconnect with some old Capella friends when we all got together last Thursday. It was great to be able to talk with other moms who are going through the joys and trials of new babies! I am looking forward to seeing them again soon!!

Trust Your Intuition

2008-04-09T14:40:00.003-06:00

We have spent the last few days in a quite an uproar and learned this-trust your intuition.
Baby started daycare last week (he goes Monday's, Friday's, and every other Wednesday). On Monday I called to check on him and the daycare person I spoke to told me he was hungry and I didn't provide enough milk so she fed him WATER. I hung up the phone and after crying and composing myself I canceled the rest of my day and went to pick up Abram. The daycare people told me that I am not feeding him enough and he should be getting 6oz every TWO hours. So, I spent that evening and the next day talking with a La Leche leader, a lactation consultant, an RN at the clinic, and Abram's pediatrician. What I found out was that Abram is growing fine and has actually moved up to the next weight bracket (25%)! The daycare people just need to learn more about what soothes Abram besides milk. Abram returned to daycare for a half day today along with a doctors note about his proper milk consumption. He had a good day.

I want to be angry at the daycare but really they were just looking out for Abram and they really thought that he needed more food. We are adjusting his eating a little because I am still feeding him about 10 times a day and the doctor says that he is ready to move up in oz per feeding and eat less times per day. I also started taking Fenugreek to ensure that my milk production is where it needs to be. There are times when I am stressed about how I am going to pump out enough milk for Abram to have at daycare. There are also times when I feed Abram that he is crying and fussy when done. So, hopefully we have solved all the issues and won't have any more drama in the next few days!

Does it count?

2008-04-02T10:45:00.002-06:00

Abram just rolled over from tummy to back! It was pretty much an accident due to his activity center being on the bed...he pushed up with his left hand and because of the softness of the bed flopped right over onto his back! I know it doesn't really count but I am still pretty excited :)

Hoorah!

2008-03-29T12:42:00.002-06:00

Tonight is my very last shift at Teen Challenge!! I really enjoyed the last year working there, but am so very glad to be able to reclaim my weekends! (of course I have class next weekend but still, I will sleep and wake with the rest of the midwest!)

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back?

2008-03-27T11:30:00.002-06:00

That is what my life feels like right now. Sunday and Monday night our little guy slept for a little over 6 hour stretches! However, today and yesterday he is back to not sleeping very long at night and wanting to be held all day again. My arms and my spirit are tired.

Random Act of Kindness

2008-03-21T15:16:00.003-06:00

Baby and I were putzing around today when I heard some scraping outside. Our neighbors came over and shoveled out all our walks and driveway! It's great to live in an area where people are kind to each other.

Wait, what time is it?

2008-03-21T08:07:00.002-06:00

Abram went to sleep last night at 10:30 after a good nightcap. The next time I heard from him was...3:30!!! That is 5, count 'em, 5 hours of sleep! I haven't had 5 hours of sleep in months. I am not counting my chickens yet but it is nice to be able to think straight. Now, if only the snow would suddenly disappear....

What a night...

2008-03-19T09:53:00.003-06:00

Abram says, "I need sleep!"

Abram and I are having a bit of trouble the last couple days. Barry and I have been reading the Baby Whisperer book and preparing to get Abram on a routine and sleeping on his own. After 2 weeks with the book we have begun the process. Let me tell you, baby and I are a little tired of each other right now! We set up a going to sleep routine that starts when Bram starts to get sleepy. Right now it's taking between 20 to 40 minutes to get him to sleep. Then he will sleep on his own for somewhere between 5 minutes to 30 minutes. While yesterday was a hard day we stuck to it the whole day and last night Abram slept in his very own bassinet for the first time through the night! (he didn't sleep through the night but was returned to his bassinet after each feeding) Either Barry or I was awake most of the night however, trying to get Bram to sleep. So, today we are all a bit on the crabby side. Even though I am tired I am hopeful that this will work and Abram will be able to sleep without being held or being right next to someone while he sleeps. Wish us luck!!

Our Little String Bean

2008-03-13T10:57:00.005-06:00

Abram had his two month wellness check today. Wow, does time fly! I feel like we were just bringing him home from the hospital. Looks like our baby takes after his daddy and is long and lean. He is 24inches long which is 90th percentile but only 10lb 3oz which is 15th percentile. We have to work on chunking him up a bit!! Only one more inch until he is out of his infant car seat. Hopefully that doesn't happen before he is three months.

My Poor Husband

2008-02-21T22:01:00.002-06:00

Apparently he has been growing a beard for the last two weeks. It didn't come to my attention until a friend commented on it. Maybe one day Abram will stop crying long enough for me to pay attention to the details again...

Official Notice: Nursing Strike Over, Poop Strike On

2008-02-19T21:02:00.002-06:00

Ah, it is nice to be able to feed my son again! Our time was stressful but it is over...there are still some remnants but for the most part we are in good shape. That you so very much for the advice posted. I tried it all and it got us through to this point. I really can't thank those of you who posted enough!!!

Now, Abram is apparently on to a poop strike. Back to the drawing board for advice I suppose :) I know that around 6 weeks babies can become so efficient with eating that they only poop 1 time a week but...that doesn't stop me from worrying. Any advice mommies?

A Call For Help From Nursing Moms

2008-02-16T23:07:00.002-06:00

CAUTION: If you are male or uncomfortable with anatomy used for Nursing you may want to skip this post :)

Ok, so here is the deal. Bram and I have never had an easy time with nursing. He had trouble latching in the beginning. However, up until recently we have always been successful in getting a good full feeding done. Last weekend I had to leave Bram for about 3 hours at a time to attend class (I was luckily able to come home at lunch and nurse him). I was worried about nipple confusion with the bottle and breastfeeding but he did wonderfully. He didn't have a problem taking the bottle and didn't have a problem returning to breastfeeding. This past Thursday I came down with the stomach flu. I was too sick to nurse so Barry feed him some milk I had been storing in the fridge and I pumped when I could. As my temp went up my milk supply went down and I was barely pumping an ounce from both sides during one session. We ended up only needing to supplement with formula twice before I was feeling better and getting back on a regular pumping/nursing schedule. So, here is the big problem...after 1 and a half days of bottles my baby won't breastfeed anymore. I can sometimes trick him into it for a little while but mostly when I try he screams and pulls away and looks at me like I killed his dog. We stopped giving him anything with an artificial nipple for a little while (bottle, pacifier) but soon realized the kid was starving and we had to let him eat somehow. With the help of a dropper to start him off I was able to get him to latch a couple times. Currently he will latch on to only one side and eat with much coaxing for about 15 minutes before screaming. Last feeding after having him latched (while sucking and making swallowing sounds) he ate 2 oz of a bottle as well. This leads me to believe he was not getting much. I have been pumping and my milk supply is going back up but is at least at 2 oz a feeding. Any help or advice on getting my milk supply back up and getting Abram to latch again without terrorizing him would be so greatly appreciated!

Happy Birthday Barry!

2008-02-11T20:58:00.000-06:00

Barry turned 31 today! Currently Dad and son are taking a birthday nap before Abram gets up for the night...

30 Pounds?

2008-02-07T19:15:00.000-06:00

That is how much weight I have lost in the three weeks since I delivered Abram! So, 8lbs of baby, let's say 3lbs of placenta...that leaves 19lbs of water??? I knew I was retaining water (and there are the bags of water the baby lived in as well) but that seems like a lot. As much as 30lbs sounds I still am not close to my prebaby weight. I realize I don't need to be there three weeks after delivery, but just saying I have a ways to go before fitting into that bridesmaid dress for my brother's wedding in July!

Our little Chunky Monkey

2008-01-31T16:51:00.000-06:00

Bram, Age: 2 Weeks

Abram did a great job gaining weight his first two weeks of life. He left the hospital at 7lb 5oz and at his appointment on Tuesday weighed in at 8lb 5oz! He is a good little eater!! Bram seems to have a bit of colic and has his crying jags, but we love him so much that we think he's cute even when he's crying. We just throw on the vacuum cleaner and it calms him down really quickly. Maybe he will like to vacuum when he gets older?

And the Winner is...

2008-01-26T18:40:00.001-06:00

Brandy with a phenomenal guess that was just 5 minutes off baby's birth time!! He weighed in at 7lb 15 oz. More details to follow!

Ultrasound pics

2008-01-15T16:10:00.000-06:00

Here are some pictures from our 41 Week Ultrasound as well as some past pics, Isn't he a cutie!
Our Baby's profile...looks like he is going to have some chubby cheeks!

The fuzzy while lines are the baby's hair! He definitely has a lot of it but since we don't know the angle this picture is at, he either has a cap of hair or the male patterned baldness hair that is above the ears and wraps around the back of the head! Let's hope for the cap!!

Baby likes to show off his feet....

Baby's big foot at 41 Weeks!

Baby's foot at 20 Weeks

Baby's foot at 17 weeks.

A Guessing Game

2008-01-15T15:58:00.000-06:00

We had a long doctor's appointment today and learned that baby is not making any moves towards being born. We have an induction date scheduled for the latest they will let me go, January 21st. We are hoping and praying baby decides to be born before then as Pitocin doesn't have the best reputation. I am tired, I am crabby...feel sorry for Barry.

To make this time a little more interesting I have decided to start a poll. My original guess was that baby would be born on the 15th...looks like there isn't much chance of that happening. When do you think baby will be born? Post a comment with your guess between today and the 21st, if you want to add a time of day and weight go right ahead! Let's see who gets the closest!!

Sigh...

2008-01-13T15:10:00.000-06:00

I think we may have offended our baby in some way and he is retaliating by not being born. As much as I love not being able to sleep, constant heartburn, the inability to move/walk/stand without pain, and just feeling overall miserable I really wish my child would decide to be born.

Class is over for the weekend. There is officially nothing else to wait for!

Ho Hum

2008-01-11T08:27:00.000-06:00

Well, I have had a couple irregular contractions but other than that there is nothing else going on. I decided not to go to my practicum today because of the random contractions (and I feel like something resemling a whale). I have class all weekend so that should help pass the time...

Doctor's Appointment

2008-01-09T11:05:00.001-06:00

I guess I am just feeling confused. I am upset because I am not progressing very much and I am upset because my doctor said that she won't let me go past January 22nd (two weeks from my due date). Apparently I want to both have my baby and not have my baby. Chalk it up to hormones I guess. I am basically worried that I won't go on my own and have to be induced which is going to complicate the process quite a bit. If you feel like praying for baby to come on his own before the 22nd I would appreciate it.

Good-Bye Due Date

2008-01-08T22:09:00.000-06:00

Well, here we are bidding the due date good-bye. Good-bye due date. We had high hopes for you. But, we will move on...in hopes that tomorrow brings more contractions than today.

Which was zero by the way. Baby didn't even consider making today his birthday. Oh well. Many thanks to my friend Mandy for helping me get through the day a little quicker with a trip to Jamba Juice. Barry and I also went on the hospital tour again so we could get used to the labor and delivery area a little more. Now, we wait.

I have a dr. appt. tomorrow morning so I will post any updates after that.

Hello Due Date!

2008-01-08T06:49:00.000-06:00

It is with great anticipation that we start this day! If our baby is anything like me he will decide to arrive on the 8th day of the month he is due, which is his due date, as it was mine in September of 77. My mom tells me that when she went into labor on her due date she thought, "no, this can't be it, no one has their baby on their due date!" Yet that was the day I was born. Come on little boy, follow in your mom's footsteps!! We are ready to meet you!!!

Baby's Room

2008-01-04T07:37:00.000-06:00

Baby's room is now completely ready for him after my mom and I worked on it for a few days this week. I wish I could post pictures with my camera but we are still missing the cord that we need to do that. All the bedding is washed and on the crib and bassinet. We made and hung some pictures on the wall as well as a couple shelves, the quilt that we made, and a little music box that I had in my room growing up. I like to sit in his room and think about what it will be like when he is here!

We think baby is going to take his time getting here though. I am starting to efface (about 50%) and just barely starting to dilate. We (along with the dr.) think he will arrive after the 15th. Even though this was what I was originally planning for I am still feeling impatient! At the same time i am glad baby is taking his own time and developing as he needs to. The Dr. asked me if I wanted my membranes stripped at my appt yesterday. Even though I know I will not do that, it did sound tempting at the time... Never fear, I will not rush baby.

My mom was up here from New Year's day until yesterday helping us clean and get everything ready. We got so much done while she was here! I would like to nominate her as the Best Mom in the World!!

39 Weeks

2007-12-30T21:33:00.000-06:00

Wow! I can't believe that I am 39 weeks pregnant! Baby has been very very active the last few days. It is my hope that he is trying to search out his exit and is working his way there! I think that I may have been having some light contractions over the last few days. There is definitely stomach tightening that occurs and makes me stop and breath. Since I have never been in labor before I am not sure if this is the very beginnings of the process or if it could still be a million years before I deliver this kid. I have been very uncomfortable the last few days so whenever Baby Saeger is ready to meet us, we are ready for him! Of course, as of my last dr. appt there was no progress to speak of.

Waiting somewhat impatiently to see when we will be celebrating our baby's birthday every year...

It Should Be Illegal

2007-12-26T20:55:00.000-06:00

...To have a stomach bug while 9.5 months pregnant, and it's Christmas. Oh well, I have been more sick in my life. Good practice for labor?

Barry and I spent a very enjoyable Christmas at my parents house. On Christmas eve we spent time with my nieces Kenzie and Madi as well as my brother Bill and his fiance Rachel. On Christmas day my brother Chris and sister Amy and their significant others were over along with my niece Aubrey. Unfortunately, we didn't get to see Sophi and Caleb as they were with their dad for the holiday. We all had a great time, played some fun games, and watched a couple good movies.

I have been reflecting on how neat it is to be pregnant around Christmas time. I can relate a bit better to the Christmas story as I await the arrival of our little one, similar to Mary awaiting the arrival of Jesus.

37 Weeks

2007-12-18T17:07:00.001-06:00

Well, I am now considered "full term". Baby is developed and just sitting around getting chunkier. However, my dr. doesn't foresee baby coming any time soon...I am not dilated or effaced at all. Not a bit. We weren't planning on baby making an appearance any time before New Year's so no worries for us. And, we are totally cleared for traveling to Albert Lea for Christmas. I did get a copy of my medical records to have with just in case.

Now, my gripe...I participate in a baby website for mother's expecting their babies with a January due date. Almost every post is about how some mom is "ready" to have the baby so is asking her dr. to strip her membranes, drinking Castor oil, or any number of "wives tales" to get their baby to come earlier. Why are people so opposed to the natural course and waiting for their baby to come on his/her own? These things aren't working for people, and they wonder why...maybe because your baby needs more time to prepare to survive/thrive alone in this world. I understand that this late in pregnancy is very uncomfortable (and am reminded of this every time I move), but wouldn't instinct make the mom want to protect the baby as long as possible, not force her out before she is ready? Ok, I am off my soapbox.

5 Down 0 to go!!!!!!!!!

2007-12-13T10:59:00.000-06:00

I am done! For better or worse all of my assignments are in and my semester has officially ended! Now to wait for grades...

I am so excited I am not quite sure what to do with myself. There are lots of things that need to be done to prepare for baby including:
- wash baby clothes
- finish decorating baby room
- register at the hospital (I know I know this should have been done 10 weeks ago)
-continue the search for child care for March

Tonight our friends from church are throwing us a baby shower. What a great way to celebrate the baby and rejoice that I am done with school for awhile!!

I want to cry

2007-12-12T14:40:00.001-06:00

So, I just finished my "mock" oral exam for Ethics. I did not do well. We get our scores right after and it was not pretty. If it was real I would not have passed the exam. Luckily (can I even say that?) it is only going to affect my grade and lets me know how much I need to study for the real thing. I feel so dumb. Now I have to get it together and write my take home exam, getting a perfect score so I can try to not make my GPA plummet too far with this class. At least I only have one thing left, right?

On a better note, the baby is for sure head down and engaged. We had a mini ultrasound at my last appointment to check. Now, you may have heard my story about pointing a flashlight at the bottom of my belly because babies respond to light...well, I tried this 3 nights ago. After about 2 and a half hours there seemed to be some significant movement and baby is now head down. So you can laugh if you want to but I wholeheartedly believe that little flashlight did the trick!

Well, I may get a B in a class but at least I am less likely to have a C-section...

Where are my ankles?

2007-12-11T07:23:00.000-06:00

I recently lost my ankles and my feet have no bones in them. I guess I am lucky that I have just started to swell at 36 weeks but boy is it not so fun. I go to the doctor today to have my check up and will be going once a week from now on. Today I "get" to have a swab done to test for streb B and I am going to ask her about the position of the baby again. Hopefully he is head down now! Please pray that I don't have Strep B or I will have to be connected to an IV for antibotics during labor (rather than being able to move around freely).

Only 1 day left for school though! (well today and tomorrow). I have two projects down and 3 to go. The only one I am worried about at this point is my Ethics binder that is due tomorrow. It is a HUGE part of our grade and I am just worried it's not good enough.

Well, back to homework I guess...

Feeling Good!

2007-12-06T10:12:00.000-06:00

I gave a presentation in my ethics class yesterday. It went well and checks off one of my 5 final projects due in the next week. I feel relieved knowing that it is out of the way. Now I just have to finish my final ethics project, write a 5 page paper, start and finish a take home exam, and study for my oral exam next Wednesday. Our ethics instructors had the great idea that we should do a "mock" oral exam to help us prepare for the oral that we take for licensure. All I have to say is that if it was really "mock" it wouldn't have a point total attached to it! I am a little obsessive about my GPA and fear what the "mock" oral exam will do to it. Most people who have already taken it got 14 out of 20...not good for a class that has a 100 point total. But, I am still relieved that I only have 4 things left and am very excited for when I email in my take home exam and call it the end of the semester!

One Week and a Day!

2007-12-04T09:39:00.000-06:00

Apparently I love count downs...this particular one is until the end of my semester at school. I can not wait until I have my final paper in and can breath a sigh of relief, knowing that there is nothing more I can do and am finished! After the 13th I will only have work on the weekends and practicum on Mondays and Fridays. I don't know what I will do with all my extra time! I have already started making plans with friends and family to fill up my free days with fun.

My mom was here over the weekend for my baby shower and helped get the baby's room together. She and Barry put together the crib while I rearranged some closets. I was a little testy so I decided to stay away and let them put it together without my presence. Our house is back in order and little Baby Saeger has a room all of his own. If he decides to come now he will have a bed to sleep in, diapers and clothes to wear, and toys to play with.

Barry was pretty excited about some Vikings items that we received at the shower. He (baby) has a onesie in jersey material and my mom made him a blanket to match one she made for Barry a couple years ago.

35 Weeks and counting!

We Made It

2007-11-28T19:13:00.000-06:00

Well, here we are at 34 weeks! I have been really stressed out about school, internship, and life in general but am happy to be walking around 34 weeks pregnant. It is crazy that in 6 weeks our baby's due date will be here. With the end of my semester at school and the holidays that time is going fly by!

I had a pretty bad doctor's appointment yesterday. Nothing wrong with baby but the dr. that I saw (she was actually a nurse practitioner) was horrible. She is not my normal person and I will refuse to see her ever again if they try to put me on her schedule. She was horribly condescending and very rude. I believe she thought that if she had an opinion I should change mine, ignoring my birthing classes and other medical advice I have been given. By the end of the appointment I was no longer speaking. I feel like I should have walked out in protest or at least I should call and file a complaint. It really was that bad.

Barry and I have started getting the rooms switched around so we can set up the crib! Baby will be in a bassinet with us for the first couple months but I want to have the room set up so baby can get used to being in there (maybe for naps or feeding times).

I feel a little insecure about being responsible for another human life but hopefully that goes away by the time little baby Saeger gets here!

33 Weeks

2007-11-20T07:52:00.000-06:00

Yesterday Baby Saeger hit the 33 week mark. And I hit the I have never felt more uncomfortable or huge in my life mark. I get mixed reviews from the plethora of people who feel it's their duty to comment on my size...some say "wow, you are that far along? you don't look big at all!" (love these people). Other's say, "oh my gosh you are getting so HUGE!" (don't love these people). I know most of these people are well meaning but really, if you wouldn't say it to an overweight person, don't say it to a hormonal pregnant one!

As far as baby development we have pretty much hit the safety zone but I still worry frequently about baby's health and me going into preterm labor. So, here are the upcoming milestones, next Monday marks the day they won't stop labor if it starts, Dec. 17th I am considered term, and Jan. 8th is baby's "due date".

Some things I have been thinking about:
I read a study that found that there is a correlation between babies born between 34-36 weeks and having a higher rate of SIDS and other mysterious problems that cause death in the first year of life. (They didn't use prior to 34 week babies in the study because those are in a different class of premies). The rate is still very very low, but is higher than the term infants.
I really feel like our baby is actually 6 days younger than it's due date. What that means is on or after Dec. 23 I will be able to breathe a sigh of relief and know that my baby is term and will not be at a greater risk of death in the first year of life.
I feel huge and am fighting the urge to wish my baby was born now. I go over these facts daily in my mind to keep myself focused on keeping baby as healthy as possible.

Have a HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Baby Showers!

2007-11-13T14:32:00.000-06:00

I had my first baby shower this past Sunday. My aunts Brandy and Darlene threw it for us and they did a fabulous job!! We had good food and played some really fun games. As a bonus to the games I got to bring home a ton of candy so that was fun too! I am so appreciative of everyone who came to celebrate our little baby. We received a TON of wonderful gifts that I have been playing with since we got back home on Sunday night. Having this shower makes it feel like the baby is going to be here so soon!

I had a 32 week check up today. Baby is doing well but we did find out that he is still in the breech position (usually they are head down by 30 weeks). The dr. said they don't start worrying about that for another 4 weeks but I am still concerned. I really really really really really really don't want to have a C-section so I am praying that little baby Saeger gets into flipping mode and turns. I asked the dr. if there was any hereditary cause for being breech mentioning that I was when I was in the womb. She said there was and then asked if I would like to have a C-section or have them try to turn the baby if he doesn't turn on his own over the next 4 weeks. Yikes!

A Horse Named Charlie

2007-11-07T09:29:00.000-06:00

I just want to say I really, really hate this horse. I woke up on Sunday in much pain because of Charlie's presence in my right calf. I have upped my milk and banana intake to no avail. The damage has been done and my right calf has hurt constantly since Sunday morning. In addition, this morning I could feel my left calf trying to scrunch up to Charlie's influence. Now, I only have this to say...GO HOME CHARLIE!

Hemispheres

2007-11-05T08:46:00.000-06:00

My stomach recently divided itself into hemispheres. Very appropriate to it's globe-like appearance. The Western Hemisphere seems to be slightly larger than the Eastern. I will let you know if I start to rotate and acquire my own gravitational pull.

The Quilt is Done!

2007-10-30T15:40:00.000-06:00

My mom, Carol, Aunt Carol Lee, and I all worked together to make a quilt and valences for the baby's room. Unfortunately because of technical difficulties I am unable to post pictures of it right now. I was unsure how it would all turn out but I ended up loving it! It's nice to have a little part of the baby's room together. Hopefully soon we will have time to make the big switch of the rooms.

In other news, I am 30 weeks this week! It is a very exciting milestone to hit. The doctor told me at my appointment today that in 4 more weeks they won't stop labor if it starts! That is one month away!! I am planning for the baby to be staying where he is for much longer than that, but it still exciting to know I am that far along. Barry and I are still debating what we want to call our little buddle of joy. Feel free to post any name suggestions, we are accepting all offers!!

Preparing

2007-10-21T17:53:00.000-06:00

Sometimes I feel that all I am doing lately is preparing. I am preparing for final projects in two of my classes at school. I am preparing for more clients and for a group therapy session on Boundaries at my internship. But most of all I am preparing both mentally and physically to have a baby in less than 3 months. I occasionally ask Barry if he realizes that in three months we will be parents! At times I feel totally unprepared and other times I am so excited I don't know how I will wait out the next few months. This past weekend my mom and I worked on a quilt that we are putting on the wall in the baby's room. We will hopefully finish that and get some valences made this next Thursday when my mom and Carol visit for the day. I am excited to get the baby room together and will post some pics of the quilt and valences when they are finished! I am pretty happy with the result and glad I didn't have to spend a ton of money on a set when most of it typically isn't used (can't use the bumper or comforter in the crib because of SIDS)

I had a dr appt last Thursday and it was pretty uneventful. Everything is progressing nicely and I passed my 3 hour gestational diabetes test so all is well with Baby Saeger!

I can't move

2007-10-17T07:32:00.000-06:00

That is how tired I am. Two days ago I felt great, no worries, no fatigue, no aches. Yesterday and today I feel like I am going to go through the rest of my days in a fog. I have absolutely no energy. However, life goes on and I have class and practicum. And today I am making a trek into downtown St. Paul to review a large database of childcare providers. It is funny to think that we don't even have a baby yet but we need to get on waiting lists for childcare. Luckily for us we only will need care Monday's, Friday's, and every other Wednesday morning. However, this may complicate finding childcare who won't make us pay for more time than we are actually there. Wish me luck!

On a more positive note we are working away at our 28th week of pregnancy and the baby has picked up in his movements big time. I woke up at 3am this morning to a big kick in the stomach (no it wasn't Barry kicking me!). It's definitely fun to see how active Baby S is becoming! He should be just over 3lbs now. We go to the Dr. again tomorrow and that starts the every two week appt schedule. Time is going by so fast...

You're too sweet!

2007-10-04T15:52:00.000-06:00

This is what my husband said to me when I told him that I failed my 1 hour glucose test. What optimism! I spent this morning in the lab at my clinic drinking a very sweet glucose drink and waiting an hour to have my blood drawn. After an hour your natural insulin should bring your blood sugar level down below 140. Mine was at 148. 9 little points separate me from someone who passes the test. Apparently there is a pretty high false positive rate for this one hour test so I am off to do the three hour next week. So, next Thursday I will show up at the clinic having fasted from midnight the night before. I will get one initial blood draw, drink the sugary drink again, and then have three more draws one hour apart. I don't get to eat until I am done with the fourth draw. Baby is NOT going to be happy about that!

Grandma

2007-09-30T16:14:00.000-06:00

My Grandma passed away last Tuesday. It was a hard time for us as family and friends gathered to remember her. Here are some of the fun memories I have about my Grandma...

When I was little Billy and I would run to our rooms to clean them everytime Grandma drove up. We knew that she would check on how clean our room were so we wanted to make sure they were up to standard!

Grandma got me a dog for one of my birthdays even though my mom was very against the idea (unfortunately, the dog didn't get to stay around for long...) It was my favorite birthday present ever though!

When I was in college Grandma used to make me these really great care packages that included all of my favorites; a jar of olives, smoked oysters and crackers, and candy! I could eat for a week from those packages.

Grandma has made me tons blankets, pillows, and other craft items that I have around my house. It's fun to look at them and see how much she thought about us grandkids as she made them.

Grandma LOVED Barry. Everytime I would see her she would ask me "where's my Barry?".

Grandma was really excited about our little baby on the way. We found a little baby outfit in her house that she had bought to give to him. That will be a special outfit for him when he gets to wear it!

http://www.albertleatribune.com/articles/2007/09/30/obituaries/09-27-2007/obit1.txt

Happy Anniversary!

2007-09-24T09:02:00.000-06:00

Today is Barry and I's 2nd anniversary! It comes on an uneventful day when Barry is off at work and I am at home getting papers done for school. We did celebrate last night by going out to dinner and renting a movie. It was nice and relaxing which is what we needed after all of the bathroom and car trouble going on!

In honor of our anniversary my strange dream last night was about getting married. (part of pregnancy seems to be having really vivid, strange dreams so going to sleep is always an adventure for me!) So, in the particular dream Barry and I were married but I was going to get married again...to Barry. So, I had this big debate about whether I was a polygamist and which Barry I loved more. I think this dream perfectly depicts how Barry and I have changed over the last two years. Barry and I and our relationship is so different than what it was two years ago. It is fun to think about how much better I have grown to know my husband over the last two years. I am looking forward to how much things will adjust and change as we grow our family! Here is to many more happy years!!

On a side note, I am 25 week pregnant today, only 15 weeks until we meet our new little person!

An Adventure!

2007-09-20T16:00:00.000-06:00

Today I locked myself out of my house. We don't have any secret hidden keys so I was in a little predicament... I had just called the auto mechanic about my nonstarting car and was a bit flustered. I decided to go for a walk, separated my car keys from my house key, and walked out the door. As soon as the door clicked shut I realized that I had my car keys, not the house keys. I was without a key, phone, purse, or bathroom, this was trouble! Unfortunately, I don't know any of my neighbors and didn't feel comfortable asking any of them to hang out in their home until my husband came home. I couldn't call Barry without a phone, and I couldn't bum around shopping without my purse. I decided to go see if my sister-in-law was home. Luckily she was so I was able to leave a message for Barry and visit with her while I waited for him to call back. I had fun catching up as I hadn't seen Michelle in awhile. It made the time locked out not seem like an ordeal but a fun afternoon! Lesson learned: Check which keys are in my hands BEFORE I leave the house!

Utter Frustration

2007-09-18T15:57:00.000-06:00

That pretty much sums up my day today. I had to leave class for a scheduled dr. appt that I made before I knew my fall class schedule. I told the instructor and let him know that I would be back for the last hour of class (I have three hour classes). However, as I am sitting in the waiting room watching the minutes tic by I realize...going back to class is probably not going to be happening. I waited for AN HOUR AND A HALF before I saw the doctor. And of course my appt took all of 10 minutes. Apparently they are trying out a new scheduling system....I let her know in no uncertain terms that it doesn't work. Now, I know that normally you wait for a dr. appt for a little bit but when you have to see the OB every 4 and soon to be 2 weeks, their timeliness matters. I want to complain but I don't know who to call. I feel like just calling the appointment line and asking who do I talk with to make a complaint. Maybe enough people will call so that they go back to the old system...where I would walk in the door, give my name, find a magazine, and be called in before I could open it. The saying "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" comes to mind here! Now, the rest of my day just feels off kilter. It's been raining all day so I have had to run around in the rain. Got lost going to a different grocery store that is in route from the clinic. Of course had to wait in the endless line to check out at the store. Then walk with groceries in the pouring rain to the car. To top it off, I am driving Barry's car because mine has decided that it won't start. And, Barry's car needs new brakes which I was reminded of when I almost slid through the stoplight because of the rain and bad brakes. I need to go to bed and start over but we have our birthing class tonight so I have to cook dinner so Barry and I can eat before class and get the snacks ready that I am bringing. Calgon take me away!

On a more fun note...my due date is moved up to January 8th. This one is actually official from my OB rather than me trying to communicate with the OB, Ultrasound Tech, and Nurse Practitioner who don't talk to each other.

My nose, his chin?

2007-09-17T14:26:00.000-06:00

Lately I have been wondering what our little boy is going to look like. I sit and study the ultrasound pictures like that will help me predict! We already know that the baby's second toe is longer than the big toe...of course that is a trait that Barry and I share so genetically that was pretty probable. I am curious to know if the little Saeger will have the Olson chubby cheeks or Barry's cleft chin and widow's peak. I know it's less than 4 months until we will see him but it seems like so long! So, what do you think...my chin and Barry's mouth? The other way around? I guess only time will tell...

Wow

2007-09-12T18:27:00.000-06:00

So, we successfully attended our first Bradley birthing class. Our instructor is new so there is only one other couple in the class. I think we are going to like it a lot! However, we watched a video that was a little out there. First, I have never seen so many babies being born in one sitting. I have even seen the real thing and it didn't compare to this video montage of births we witnessed. It may be because Bradley does not teach the traditional on your back birthing method (which is one of the worst positions to deliver a child through) that it looked so strange to me. We also saw a couple water births and it made me sad that it is not an option for me, my hospital doesn't do them.

We also have learned 5 different exercises to help strengthen and stretch the pelvic area for better birthing. It scares me to think that one day in the not too far future I will be birthing a child. No matter if I practice every detail of what I am learning or ignore it all, I still will be giving birth in one form or another very soon!

Birthing Classes

2007-09-11T09:04:00.000-06:00

Barry and I start our next step in the process towards the birth of our child. Birthing classes! Our first class is tonight at the Peapods studio in St. Paul. We have decided to go with the Bradley Method which supports natural birth. They teach methods of relaxation and breathing that help the mother get through the labor without unnecessary medical intervention. They also do education on what happens during the process of birth so that fear of the unknown can be replaced the joy of the process. My hope is to make it through the birth of our son without drugs. The class also teaches husbands a lot of techniques to use in the delivery room to assist and really be a part of the process. I am sure Barry is soooo excited about that!